Big Green One Eyed Monster

I recently spent a good hour on the phone, consolling a friend who was absolutely beside herself. She had been scathingly attacked on her appearence by one of her Lecturers. A Woman with a P.H.D, in a position of power failed my incredibly intelligent, capable friend just because she happens to be devastatingly beautiful.  Berated for being too young, too thin & too pretty,  this lecturer also added that she could use her looks to persuade a males opinion, but that it also made her less authoritive and there in lied her problem. In plain english, this well educated & successful Woman was balatantly abusing her authority in this situation to satisfy her jealousy, which obviously stemmed from her own physical insecurities.

This is not an isolated incident. The Big, one eyed green monster has been rearing its ugly head quiet frequently of late. It has become apparent, the while overweight Women get slently judged, we are quiet happy to vocalise & even openly attack a thin or attractive women. But why? Is it because we think someone so thin couldn't possible be offended? What if they had a life threatening disease that caused their petiteness? Since when is it ok to approach a perfect strange and tell them they look "gaunt" or "anorexic"?

I had a woman recently come up to me in a pub to tell me she thought I was beautiful. I said thankyou & offered to buy her a drink. Drink accepted, we made fast friends. Until I was being filrted with and she wasn't, which is where she loudly announced that she would prefer a much more intelligent conversation to the one I was immersed in. Needless to say, our friendship ended right then and there.

So heres the ettiquette lesson of the day: If you don't have anything nice to say, DON'T SAY ANYTHING AT ALL! It's not ok to approach an almost stranger and criticise their body, intelligence or anything about them. Ever.  Let this be a lesson to everyone. Green is not a colour suited to everyone, least of all when worn in the Jealous hue.

A Whole New World....

Age: 22 and nine tenths. City: Adelaide. Occupation: Finance. Studying: Journalism. Colour: Yellow. Relationship Status.........

Facebook Married to my former Housemate (female), planning a faux wedding to one of my male best friends, previously seperated from a male I can only now start calling a friend, utterly infactuated with a man who was once more than a friend, oh and has taken a foreign lover with an adonis body.

That about answers it. With friends as lovers and lovers as friends, it's a wonder I don't believe in the perfect one for every person. Perhaps Marriage in the Christian sense is outdated and the Polyamorists have hit the nail on the head. Instead of searching for one perfect person and ending up with no one (or even worse, a highly imperfect someone) have several different relationships at once, where ones specific need is satisfied in one specific way by each parter. I.E John for Social, Jack for Intellectual, James for Economical, Jared for Family, Jeremy for Emotional, Jacob for Spiritual and Jose' for Sexual. In other words, responsible non-manogamy.

So what makes being a Polyamorist different to being a cheating four letter word? Polyamorists believe in the possibility of having multiple romantic loving relationships with the knowledge and consent of all partners concerned.  As long as everyone involved is being open, honest, responsible and communicative, deep and loving relationships can be formed between more then 2 partners.

Before you go jumping to conclusions, Polyamory is not free love a group sex, or even sex at all. It's about acknowleding that sometimes, the best relationship you could possible have is not just with one person, but with several different people for different needs. John may be great fun in social circumstances and get along amzingly with your friends, but when you've had a rough day Jeremy is better at knowing exactly what will lift you spirits. Neither may light you fire the way Jose' can, but at the end of the day, when you want a good, hearty intellectual discussion, Jack is your man. As log as John, Jeremy, Jose & Jack are all aware of eachother & are ok wth one anothers existence, there is no reason why we can't all haveout cake and eat it too.

More to come on this topic at a later date...